The little things……
Today, I am grateful for the little things.
A sunny day after a week of rain; the smell of fresh laundry drying on the line as I look out across the jagged ocean rocks at low tide, and a warm salty breeze blowing gently on my skin. Normally, at this time of year I would be wrapped in a wool sweater and gloves sitting outside as I write, but here I am. At the end of the world as we know it, on the edge of a piece of land jutting into the pacific. I have no home, no job, definitely no hot water and I am here completely alone without any plans of ever going back to a lifestyle that nearly killed me.
For the first time in my life I truly know my purpose and I’ve never been happier. My companions here are the less complicated variety, I don’t need to call the police if someone outside is monkeying around because they ARE monkeys. Having a morning coffee just now, I watched two pairs of woodpeckers courting and a family of capuchins stopped by to say hello. They like to hang out all day sometimes and steal my bananas, and a skinny racoon friend likes to sneak in through the cat door at night sometimes. These types of break ins I can handle and I can’t help thinking how these strange days have made it so painfully obvious why I had to follow my calling here as a healer. Not as a veterinarian with clients and patients, but a healer, a medicine woman, regardless of species, equipment and supplies, whether somebody was paying or not, or even paying attention for that matter. There’s an overwhelming sense of just wanting to fix things, to mend the broken pieces, to help where possible. Some of us have drifted far away from our initial reasons for pursuing this profession. In all the turmoil and daily struggle to survive, to stay relevant, to stay in business without losing yourself or selling your soul to the almighty dollar, we forget.
We forget why we paid for our education, experience and perfectionism with blood, sweat and tears.
For years. Why we are still paying. I give free advice now so I can stop feeling the need to monetize every professional conversation but not feel obligated because I choose the method of giving. I needed to resolve this in my own soul, but the method is different for everyone.
We forget why we couldn’t even imagine doing something else with our lives because this is who we were/are and not just a profession. I know one veterinarian who was so burnt out she kept saying she wished she could swap places with the cleaning lady.
But these days, these things are easy to forget when it’s easier to remember the negative online reviews or how do I maintain my practice in this brave new pandemic universe, how do I navigate the new, when the old was barely sustainable. Our lives were stressful and chaotic enough before the COVID apocalypse, now some of us have left the profession for good, most of us are farther along the burnout highway and some are just hopping on for the ride and I truly hope it’s not business as usual for the overworked, the undervalued and the taken advantage of. The situation is set up for a complete disaster if we don’t see this as an opportunity as a profession to change our fundamental belief that we come second to our calling and our responsibilities. Some of us have thrived through this crisis, but we will have to wait and see what kind of mental toll it will take.
We have to remember why we became healers in the first place, forget about the business consumer programming, or this false sense of needing to please everyone that we’ve been told are necessary to practice and start placing value on ourselves, our colleagues, our teams and putting just as much if not more effort into our health and wellbeing so we can care for each other and GET THROUGH THIS. Not to mention that our mental and emotional health is imperative for the wellness of our patients. If you have nothing left then you have nothing to give.
Remember, and be grateful for the little things, that’s where I’m going to start.
